Motherhood

Yesterday Lauren walked into the room with her toy phone wanting to have a pretend conversation.

"Pretend I'm at college Mama,"she said.

"Okay," I replied holding my hand up to my ear.

After a few exchanges about her "classes" and "missing home" I wondered about what she might want to study in college...

"What do you want to be when you grow up Lauren?" I asked.

After a big sigh (apparently I should have known the answer), she wrapped her little arms around my neck and said decidedly....

"I want to be a Mommy."

Her answer reminded me of a poem I found years ago when my children were very young:

I'd rather be a mother than anyone on earth,

Bringing up a child or two of unpretentious birth...

I'd rather tuck a little child all safe and sound in bed,

than twine a chain of diamonds about my carefree head.

I'd rather wash a smudgy face with round, bright, baby eyes,

Than paint the pageantry of fame or walk among the wise.

-- Meredith Gray

Although my little one's faces are not quite as smudgy or pudgy as they used to be and their infant cries have now grown into quarrels and contention. I still count myself lucky each night to tuck them in bed and kiss them goodnight. It's still with pride and great pleasure that I fill in the blank under "occupation" with the word "Mother."

These thoughts were fresh on my mind when I spent the afternoon this week in Joseph's 2nd grade class sorting through hand drawn self portraits of what the kids had said they wanted to be when they grew up. They were adorable. As I flipped through each one I couldn't help but smile at the diversity in each child's dream. I've known many of these kids for years and so it was fun to see them imagining themselves in future careers that seemed incredibly fitting to their little personalities, even at this young age.

Another observation I noted was that none of the little girls had said that they wanted to be a mother. I found this very interesting and frankly a little sad. It made me reflect upon our modern world. Being a mother and homemaker seem to be a dying art. Many people today don't view motherhood & homemaking as an acceptable occupation simply because there is no monetary gain. I worry that the joy and beauty found in motherhood will never be realized by many women because they are trained to think that there is no value in doing something that doesn't earn them a paycheck.

The greatest joys in life cannot be measured in monetary ways. Who can put a price on the joy received during a tender moment with your child or pay you for the satisfaction you feel when you see your children learning such lessons as kindness, courage and perseverance? Money cannot buy that sense of accomplishment you feel when you see your children growing into leaders among their peers or watching their talents grow and develop as a result of your personal efforts on their behalf. There is nothing like the joy that comes when you are able to offer comfort and guidance to your children as they struggle to overcome their day to day challenges.

Not only do you benefit from watching them grow but in seeing yourself change and transform in the process. I've learned more about my own weaknesses and shortcomings by being a mother than I ever thought I would. It has been a humbling and sometimes painful experience to see your children bring out the worst in you. I used to think that I had the patience of Job, until I had children and was humbled into realizing how very far I had to go.

But they also bring out the best in you including the deepest levels of our your most human emotions. I used to think that I knew what love and sacrifice was until I held my first child in my arms and realized that without hesitation I'd give my life to protect him. I've learned about going without in order that my children might have more. More of me, more of my love and more of the comfort and security that each child craves within the walls of their home. And sometimes this means there's less time and energy to do the things that I want to do but its that sacrifice that strengthens my love for them and teaches me about priorities and what's really important. Giving up my portion of ice cream so that there is more to add to their bowls has never left me feeling deprived but surprisingly fulfilled as I see the joy that my sacrifice has given them.

I've learned more about God and have become closer to Him in the process. I've learned how much I need him to do my best and be my best. I've learned that on my own I fail miserably and that I don't like myself very much when I'm left to my own strength. I've learned about the kind of love that God has for all of us and the importance of treating others with the same kindness and respect that we wish our children would treat their brothers and sisters. I've learned about how it must hurt our Father in Heaven to see us treating each other unkindly as it hurts my heart to see my children inflicting pain on each other.

I've learned of the importance of trusting in God and being obedient to his counsel and guidance because he knows much more than I do and wants what's best for me just as I want what's best for my children.

I used to think that being a mother was all about what I could teach my children. Little did I how much I would learn from them. The lessons are hard and often ongoing but the daily struggles and experiences provide me with an array of opportunities to learn sacrifice, patience and unconditional love. These lessons and what they have done for me could never be measured in a monetary way, nor could the joy that they bring ever be equated to temporal wealth but they are nonetheless something of a treasure to me as I continue in my lifelong career as a Mother.